April 2009: A Smile
How plans turn to policy.
In the beginning was the Plan.
And then came the Assumptions.
And the Assumptions were without form.
And the Plan was without substance.
And darkness was upon the face of the Workers.
And they spoke among themselves, saying, ‘It is a crock of shit and it stinketh.”
And the Workers went unto their Supervisors and said, ‘It is a pile of dung, and none may abide the odour thereof.’
And the Supervisors went unto their Managers, saying, ‘It is container of excrement, and it is very strong, such than none may abide by it.’
And the Managers went unto their Directors, saying, ‘It is a vessel of fertilizer, and none may abide its strength.’
And the Directors spoke amongst themselves, saying to one another, ‘It contains that which aids plant growth, and it is very powerful.’
And the Vice President went unto the President, saying unto him, ‘This new plan will actively promote the growth and vigour of the company, with powerful effects.’
And the President looked upon the Plan and saw that it was good.
And the Plan became Policy.
And that is how Shit happens.
Swine flu?
A man goes into a pub with a pig under his arm. The barman spots him and says, ‘That’s the ugliest looking animal you’ve got there. Where on earth did you get it?
‘Won it in a raffle,’ says the pig.
